The Nark

It's Monday, back from the weekend that followed the day I was crowned. It's early, I'm still waking up at my desk. I hear a knock at my door. It's Goss. I ask her what's up and she enters my office and closes the door.

"Now that I know what sort of person you are," she begins, and I stop her right there.

"Excuse me?" I interrupt.

"Someone told the Boss that we were all screwing around on Friday, so now we know you can't be trusted."

I see. Everyone was fucking off on Friday with the PC troubleshooting (me included), somebody who works here probably said something to Junior who went ahead and said something to his dad, the Boss. She's assuming, of course, that it was me, the new guy. I forcefully explain to her that I'm not the nark, and that I'm offended she even assumed so. I ask why she's engage with me like that, and not just outright talk to me.

She bursts into tears. Sniveling and shaking, she apologizes to me and leaves my office.

What have I gotten myself into?

The Burger King

Sometime in April, 2014

Something went wrong with the operating system on the company's main PC. It's the hub that stores all of the company's client and vendor files, the website files, employee records---everything. Something went wrong when updating a Windows version, from what I can gather. I'm not an IT person but I love a good troubleshoot, so I have a go at it.

The two administrative assistants, Tree and Goss, are having a good time figuring out this problem with me. It's taking the better part of the morning, but it looks like I've found a fix. A driver here, a rollback there, and we're all set.

Goss runs to Burger King for lunch, comes back with a cardboard crown and hands it to me, a reward for a job well done.